Today has mostly been spent in sleep, but as for the past week or so I have been pushing and pushing myself to get things done. It seemed there were so many tasks I was behind on, and goodness, my friends had been doing so much for me. Thus when I awoke one morning not feeling so tired as the day before, I jumped to make a list and to finish as many of the items as possible. I gathered fresh Impressions for my shelves and mixed more than a dozen remedies to replenish those that had been running low in the Hume’s shop. I gave the cottage floor a thorough scrubbing and began on the many belated Wysolice gifts for my very dear friends. I wanted to show everyone how grateful I was.
However the more I did, the worse I felt. I thought perhaps if I could just finish all the things on my list, then… then… well, I don’t know… All my foolish efforts led to naught yesterday in the village. I had made up my mind to bring Mr. and Mrs. Hume the remedies for their shop, but all the way there, in the snow and wind, I was coughing and growing more and more dizzy. I was shaking all over by the time I made it to the door and saw Mr. Hume and Lorenz talking to one another across the counter. I held out my basket of bottles and was struck with a terrible coughing fit. I fell over and, oh, dropped all the remedies to the floor, glass shattering, as I desperately tried to catch my breath. I could hear feet hushing towards me, and the startled, fearful voice of Mrs. Hume as she came from the back, crying “Oh, Sonya!” My heart almost broke then. Goodness, what had I been thinking?! Lorenz helped me to a chair and Mr. Hume made a hot cup of tea, as Mrs. Hume bundled me in a blanket and scolded me for coming out when I was still obviously so unwell. She sounded so worried, and I apologized again and again for having been so thoughtless and for creating such a mess.
The hot tea helped calm my chest, and when I was finally able to breathe normally I was told I would be taken upstairs to sleep for the night. Oh no, that wouldn’t do! I couldn’t bear the thought of being even more of a burden, and I begged Mrs. Hume to let me go home. But “what of the wind and cold?” she argued. It was then that Lorenz offered to take me home in the coach that had just brought him back from his trip to the capital for Wysolice, and, though I was quite ashamed to accept, I found it better than trespassing upon the Hume’s hospitality any longer.
Once back at home, Lorenz helped me inside. He built up the fire, patted Flame on the head, then came to sit beside me as I crawled into bed, clothes and all. He sighed in his chair and asked me if I would be alright. I nodded. I felt so ashamed, and I apologized again for having been such a bother. But he said I needn’t apologize, said I was not a bother, and told me that I should only try to take care of myself better. He stood up and, seeing the “To Do List” I had crafted on my desk, picked it up and read it over. Lorenz didn’t say anything more until he had reached the door, but before going, he left me with what he called a “little reminder”. “Sonya,” he said and his voice was very low, “Your friends in the village… they care very much about you and they want to help you while you are ill. They do not need presents or thank you gifts. They do not need you to push yourself to be back to normal and to work hard. They need you to give yourself the chance to rest and to feel better.” And with that he bid me good day.
Oh dear reader, I could not help but cry. I sobbed like a little child and did not stop for a long time. Flame came up beside me and I held him to my chest, cradling him tight until my tears turned to sniffles and the sky had gone dark. I heard a baaing outside the window but did not move; neither did I open my eyes when I heard the rough, little voices close by me. Somehow they sounded gentler and each let out a deep, gruff sigh. I felt tiny hands on my hair, but did not move. Instead I lay quite still and held my sleeping fox, all while the nimble little hands brushed out my hair, lulling me into a dreamless sleep.
When I rose from bed late this morning, I found my hair had been tied back in braids with a pretty golden ribbon. My first thought was to get up, to write out this entry, and to get to work on new remedies, but instead I had a warm cup of tea, and lay back down with Flame. It is now afternoon, I felt well enough to share this, but I am tired again. I shall go back to bed. There is time enough to rest.